When I started YouTube I did it to come out of my shell. I wanted to be in front of the camera. I wanted to express my love of makeup and beauty stuff while I learned even more along the way. I started out as a nobody and for the most part at the end, I was still a nobody.

I never felt like I thrived at all on YouTube. It always felt like I had to push the envelope and constantly stay on trend and everyone that knows me, knows I don’t give a damn about trends. It became like a job that I had to do. The love and enjoyment was completely sucked out of me. Add on a dash of vindictive trolls and you have the full effect of how shitty youtube really is for some creators.

But I kept doing it thinking that one day my passion would return and all would be as it was again. It didn’t. So I concentrated on my Instagram Of course, at the time (before igtv) it was just pictures and short videos. But I found my passion again.

It was more than just beauty for me. It became a journey about learning to love me. It was about rediscovering April. The April that was full of confidence and loved herself and her body. It was remembering who I always wanted to be.

I like uplifting others spirits. I like it when I can make other people happy.

On YouTube, I never would have been able to accomplish that. So I’m here to stay on my blog and on Instagram. I hope y’all will stay with me and grow with me, as well.